I haven’t been very active on the blogosphere lately.
Partly because of work.
And partly because I’ve been thinking a lot about work-life balance. And the personal thoughts I’ve been sharing with DH on the matter, I wasn’t quite so ready to share on a public space.
But after having read this article, it made me think about the kind of hours DH and I put up and I really felt I needed to put thought to pen (or keyboard!).
Many will stir their kopi siu tai in the local coffee shop, lean forward in their seats with a frown and remark to their breakfast companions, see that is the trouble with life in Singapore – the sacrifice of health in pursuit of wealth. But that being said, it is also the general view of many that that sacrifice is necessary and entirely to be expected. And most people (in Singapore, at least) don’t consider a twelve hour day to be anything extraordinary.
Before our kids arrived on the scene, DH and I used to put in twelve to seventeen hour workdays without giving a second thought. It was just the norm. It was just…expected.
Now that we’re parents, we are at work in the day, and at home with the children in the evenings. On weekdays we wake up, breakfast with the children, leave for work, come home in the evening, bring them out to the playground if possible, or play together in the living room after dinner, give them their milk, and put them to bed. That doesn’t sound like a lot, does it? But what does it say when people’s perceptions are that, that’s too much time with the children and we’re having too good a life, we should be clocking the hours at work like the rest of ’em?
To make up for those hours, DH sometimes fires up the computer after the kids have gone to bed and beavers away till 3 am many nights in a row to meet a deadline. I have had my share of 2 am nights though not in a row. (cannot survive like he does…)
The net effect – our total work hours haven’t really gotten less from those early days without kids!
I actually did a Google search and read a few other working moms’ blogs and I find the same pattern. We all put in long hours, it’s just when those hours take place. A lot of us say we love what we do, but I guess we really need to start thinking about the implications when the things we love to do take us away from what we should do for the ones we love!
DH and I are currently probably not at risk of collapsing from overwork. At least, we think…based off our recent health medical checkup reports!
But it certainly leaves a sobering thought – are we going to continue at the pace we are going at? Here’s what’s worse…we were considering stepping up the pace!
Anyway, I wish this hadn’t had to happen and Mr Tan could have lived a longer and more fulfilling life. But I also hope you will take the time to read it and ponder about its implications on your own lifestyle. And maybe…if more of us start resolving that it isn’t the norm to do twelve hour days we’d be able to find that elusive meaning of what work-life balance really is.
Dislikes getting her fingers messy or dirty.
Will sit quietly with a book or puzzle for a good twenty-minutes.
Is the one who will insist of having a tissue to wipe her face after a meal…
Loves running his fingers through sand, gravel, pebbles and soil.
Will climb every available “mountain” and ford every idle “stream” if I turn away for just twenty seconds.
Is the one who will smear spilled porridge all over his high chair tray and then, just for good measure, rub his face on the tray!
DD picked some leaves off the ground for her scrapbook page on Perth. 🙂
And that’s a wrap! The My 1st Overseas Trip scrapbooks are now on the bookshelf along with the rest of our family albums and scrapbooks so the kids can look back at them again in the future. 😀
On our way back to Perth City from Bunbury, and at the turn off around Mandurah, we chanced upon the Kwinana Freeway by accident. It wasn’t on any of the maps we had so we just made a decision not to take the coastal route again (Highway 1) since the signs for Highway 2 indicated Perth and I’d read somewhere that the inland route was faster.
It turned out to be a great drive because the road was so smooth and we reached Perth city fairly quickly.
Finding our way to King’s Park, we sat down on a grassy verge overlooking the sea and the freeway and let the kids stretch their legs while we sat down and munched on roast chicken sandwiches.
DS discovered that rolling about in the grass was great fun. The differences between boys and girls are becoming more and more apparent to me day by day. DD would never have done anything of the sort. Or pick up pebbles from the road and roll them about in the mouth, like he did at Walpole!!
It was a pity we had to leave so soon to return the car. I would have liked to explore King’s Park a lot more. 😦
Isn’t the view amazing? 🙂
Although we didn’t see any real ones, we still got to watch a couple of short films about dolphins. I learnt that there is a darker side to the dolphins’ often portrayed friendly, playful and helpful image. There’s more than meets the eye.
The weather at Bunbury was glorious! For once the kids didn’t have to wear three layers of clothing. In fact the weather was so sunny, it was great for laundry! Good grief…We’re really establishing a reputation for ourselves in mundanity…
But we’d accumulated such a huge pile of laundry over the past few days that DH and I decided to roll up our sleeves and buckle down to some serious handwashing. So that we could save $3 on the washing machine and get value for money by tossing in a mega-ton load into the dryer for $2.
That was a morning of hard work!
Outside the laundry rooms there is a jumping pillow, which is like a huge trampoline of sorts. All four of us had tons of fun jumping on it after hanging out the laundry, and DH’s mum even found a $2 coin in the sand. Hooray! Free dryer expense! 😉
The dolphins didn’t show up at Koombana Beach, both days that we were there, which was a bit of a disappointment for DD, and for me too. 😦 Admission fee for the Dolphin Discovery Centre gives you access for a month, but of course we weren’t going to be there that long. They did say there was no guarantee that the dolphins would turn up since these were wild dolphins.
DH and I chatted to one of the volunteers there who explained that typically around this time of year there is a warm current, but this year they haven’t experienced that, which could be a plausible explanation for the dolphins not appearing very much this month, and no turtles getting washed up ashore as well. The water temperature was averaging around 12-14 degrees Celsius which is still pretty cold.
There are other exhibits and interesting information displays at the Centre to read up on though, so it was not an altogether futile outing. The centre also takes care of baby turtles washed up on Koombana Beach, there is a feeding session at 10am daily.
Other sites we took in at Bunbury…